“Meanings are not determined by situations, but we determine ourselves by the meanings we give to situations.”
— Alfred Adler · 1870 – 1937Source: What Life Should Mean to You, p. 14 · Check the source
Verified attributionWhat we know
- What is documented
- The wording is traceable to Adler's What Life Should Mean to You, notably the sentence found on page 14 of English editions.
Understanding the quote
Adler argues that events don't fix our identity—our interpretations do. By assigning meaning to situations we shape motives and choices. This line appears in What Life Should Mean to You and captures his move from determinism to human agency.
The story behind it
Adler began as a close collaborator of Freud but split to form Individual Psychology; he emphasized social purpose over instinctual drives.
Going further
- The era
- In the early 20th century, when psychology was forming rival schools and redefining human motivation.
- The thinking
- Individual Psychology says people actively interpret experiences and set goals from those interpretations. In practice, change the story you tell about events and your behavior follows.
- Key word
- Self-determinism: the idea that people help shape their lives through the meanings they assign to experience.
- Who quoted it
- The sentence is frequently reprinted in quote collections and modern self‑help texts summarizing Adler's thought.
Three challenges to live it
In the app, you pick the one that fits your day, and in the evening you say how it went.
Write for 10 minutes about a recent event: describe what happened, then rewrite its meaning by choosing an interpretation that empowers your responsibility.
Adler says meanings shape who we become. Rewriting an event's meaning consciously helps you choose the traits and actions that follow from it.
Breathe for 5 minutes while recalling a situation that upset you; notice thoughts that arise and intentionally choose a constructive meaning before you act.
A mindful pause creates space to refuse automatic reactions. Choosing a meaning during the breath practices Adler's idea of owning how events shape you.
Reach out to someone involved or who witnessed a past event; ask how they experienced it and compare interpretations to broaden the meaning you give it.
Adler teaches that meanings are chosen. Hearing others' interpretations reveals alternatives and helps you select a meaning that supports responsible growth.
How would changing the meaning you give a past event change your choices now?
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